Lukey the Czech for 6/12

June 12 – 2007

I like to poke fun at the Czech man, but the simple truth is this: the guys know how to make money on soccer…which he can then wire to Prague to perpetuate human trafficking schemes involving large breasted Czech women. Lukey is off to a roaring start, with a bankroll that has swelled to the tune of $140.68 – that’s an increase of 40.68%, math wizards.

And did I mention he’s making the pilgrimage out to LA this weekend? He is. Bet against my liver, please.

Ahhh yes, 6 more games, 4 more wins and so I believe my record stands at 8 WINS, 2 losses. Best thing about the last few days? Listening to Tommy Smith try to pronounce the Russian players names. I kept thinking, is this guy calling him a “jerkoff”, “u-off”, “shek-off”, “and-u-cough?” Dude, I’m convinced this guy is retarded (the glasses don’t help).

Second best thing about the last few days? While in Vegas I actually witnessed a “pimped-out” Hyundai Sonata and out walks a guy that looks like Joe Camel, or maybe one of the Turkish National Team players. Seriously though – 19″ wheels, limousine tinted windows, and a fat chick on his side. Perfect!

Back to the games and let me start with those that I could give two shits about: Austria and Poland – I’d rather watch my wife take a crap. Does it matter? Do I want to see it? And will it be pretty? NO, Poland wins this shitfest. And Greece-Russia: seriously, Greece are annoying. They got lucky four years ago, were boring as hell in their first match, and will lose to Russia. Ruskies win!

Portugal and Swiss – just concentrate on making fantastic watches, leave the soccer to the rest of us, Portugal wins.

Now, to the games that matter. Germany looked good- very good- in their first game. Croatia put me to sleep. I can’t see the angry Croats winning this. Germany too much, and you wonder if Croatia could use the “rest of the former Yugoslavia” right about now. Germany win.

Hard not to like Italy; they still threatened often in their loss and if they can score here early the flood gates open. Plus, how much ass must these guys pull? Italy win.

I sure hope Henry plays for the French; these guys looked a bit slow and could use an injection of pace in this game. I’m beginning to dislike the Dutch more and more; light blue socks, wtf is that? I want to call this game a tie, but between the lack of Dutch defending and French scoring…oh, there you go, TIE.

Sweden was also involved in that snoozer of a game with the ugly Greeks and, should they play another snoozer, they get waxed. I’m on Spain: f-off you Swedish socialist douche-rockets…Spain win.

And finally, the game that really matters…Czechs win and they get through, lose and they let in the guy with the Hyundai. Czechs played well against Portugal, dominated large portions of that game, and I believe my fellow countrymen pull through and take care of the Turks. To the 2nd round we go…Czechs win.

Germany v Croatia
Austria v Poland

Italy v Romania
France v Netherlands

Sweden v Spain
Greece v Russia

Turkey v Czech Republic
Portugal v Swiss