“Teardrops the size of pineapple chunks”
June 20 - 2007
Is there an FCC regulation mandating that a certain percentage of American soccer broadcasts include a moronic Scotsman? And are we not already meeting that requirement through Tommy Smyth? Apparently not.
Update: I’ve been informed that Ray Hudson is from Newcastle, not Scotland, and Tommy Smyth is Irish, not Scottish. My 5th grade teacher always said I’d amount to nothing, and that I’d have special trouble identifying the country of origin for idiotic, know-nothing color commentators.  She was right.
Not Scottish, from Newcastle. Still a goon.
Shall always be beloved in DC for his ever-so-successful stewardship of DC United. Talk about tears the size of pineapple chunks…
Comment by Jimbromski — June 20, 2007 @ 2:45 pm
Really? A Geordie? They sound that ridiculous?
Comment by garth — June 20, 2007 @ 3:09 pm
Yeah. It’s not so much an accent as it is a speech impediment.
Comment by Jimbromski — June 20, 2007 @ 3:33 pm
You are SO wrong. Ray Hudson is the most colorful color man on TV. He once said on the air that he’d buy Inter’s Crespo “a table dance next time I see him” after a spectacular goal. Compare that with the vanilla, golf-like, narcolepsy-inducing commentary we got in our US World Cup broadcasts. And come on, wasn’t it just a little nice to see Ray call out his partner for talking about Tom Cruise during a crucial part of the match? “Tom Cruise has never kicked a ball in his life. He’d pass out if he ever smelled a jock strap.” Ay yi!
Comment by Michael — June 21, 2007 @ 10:18 am
jesus. that guy is what we need more of. he actually sounds like he enjoys the game.
i suppose you’d prefer the hateful prick Wynalda? Or Arena stumbling over cue cards? Or Dellacamera explaining why soccer is so popular in those foreign countries?
Comment by pbg — June 21, 2007 @ 12:50 pm
Guys, can we maintain some persepective? It IS possible for both Ray Hudson AND Eric Wynalda to suck. I mean, the guy talks about Madrid fans boning that night, then naming their kid “Mahamadou” nine months later. He draws an analogy between tears and chunks of tropical fruit. And smelling jock straps? These are not things I want to contemplate with my football.
It really is ok to expect paid professionals to be as good as Andy Gray…or even Warren Barton. But, I suppose, there’s no accounting for taste.
Comment by garth — June 21, 2007 @ 1:47 pm
Soccer newbie here who just got GOLTV and FSC on their local cable in the past seven months and for whatever reason, I have loved listening to Ray Hudson. I live in a part of the country where the three biggest sports are College Football, Nascar, and the NFL (in that order) and I find his commentary to be quite entertaining.
He actually described a player as “having an orgasm” a couple of weeks ago in celebrating a goal.
Comment by Steven — June 21, 2007 @ 8:23 pm
Ray Hudson is Dick Vitale multiplied by 6,000.
That being said, Ray Hudson has the courage of a majestic salmon swimming upstream and the heart of ferocious panther. I love the guy.
Comment by PAIN ROONEY — June 21, 2007 @ 9:10 pm
Hudson is the SOB? My ass. The yank (and I one myself) is the dumb cunt of the GolTV broadcasts. Hudson may jabber on, but A) at least he knows what he is talking about and B) he has some enthusiasm, unlike to clueless jerk he broadcasts with. I can hear Hudson’s eyes rolling in their sockets every time his partner attempts some analysis.
Comment by Drew — July 1, 2007 @ 5:43 pm
They’re both idiots. But yes, the play-by-play guy is a bigger moron.
Comment by stuartdowningpints — July 5, 2007 @ 12:02 am
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Comment by Gary Kelly — November 12, 2008 @ 5:53 pm